“We think in terms of entertaining as a woman's chance to demonstrate her skill and the quality of her home, when actually entertaining has little to do with real hospitality. Entertaining says, "I want to impress you with my beautiful home, my clever decorating, my gourmet cooking." Hospitality, however, seeks to minister. It says, "This home is not mine. It is truly a gift from my Master. I am His servant, and I use it as He desires." Hospitality does not try to impress, but to serve.
Entertaining always puts things before people. "As soon as I get the house finished, the living room decorated, my place settings complete, my housework done - then I will start having people in." Hospitality, however, puts people before things. "We have no furniture; we'll eat on the floor." "The decorating may never get done. Please come just the same."
Because we are afraid to allow people to see us as we really are, we welcome the false ideal of entertaining. To perpetuate the illusion we must pretend we love housework, we never put our hair in rollers, our children are so well disciplined that they always pick up their toys. We must hint broadly that we manage our busy lives without difficulty. Working hard to keep people from recognizing our weak points, we also prevent them from loving us in our weakness.
Entertaining subtly declares, "This is mine -- these rooms, these adornments. These are an expression of my personality. It is an extension of who and what I am. Look, please and admire." Hospitality whispers, "What is mine is yours."
Entertaining always puts things before people. "As soon as I get the house finished, the living room decorated, my place settings complete, my housework done - then I will start having people in." Hospitality, however, puts people before things. "We have no furniture; we'll eat on the floor." "The decorating may never get done. Please come just the same."
Because we are afraid to allow people to see us as we really are, we welcome the false ideal of entertaining. To perpetuate the illusion we must pretend we love housework, we never put our hair in rollers, our children are so well disciplined that they always pick up their toys. We must hint broadly that we manage our busy lives without difficulty. Working hard to keep people from recognizing our weak points, we also prevent them from loving us in our weakness.
Entertaining subtly declares, "This is mine -- these rooms, these adornments. These are an expression of my personality. It is an extension of who and what I am. Look, please and admire." Hospitality whispers, "What is mine is yours."
~ Karen Main "Open Heart, Open Home"
p.s. (and on that note.........)
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